It's unbelievable

It's unbelievable, it really is. Everything that CAN go wrong, GOES wrong. Everything. Really, everything. You won't believe me if I tell you every thing separately, so I don't. At some point I thought it would stop, you know, everything being ruined, but somehow, it's still going on. I wonder when it will stop. I'm not going to hope for anything, because that might be one of the reasons everything is ruined.

Who or whatever goes about all the fucking up things, please stop now, it's enough. I've learned the lesson. You hate me, I know now. You don't need to prove it any more. 

Oh, one footnote, it went wrong again.  

Hello 2013!

Since 2012 has come to an end, I think I should write a message to summarize everything that happened in this year that, somehow, is related to me. A lot of things happened this year, a lot things that also changed not only me, but also a lot people around me. Some people entered my life, some had to leave. It's a pity that you cannot take all the people with you into the new year, but that is just how life goes.

I remember that I started this year in not such a good way. I was very stressed that time of the year, because my relationship was nearing its end. I've been very worried about that since December 2011 and at the end of February, it, finally, was over. If I look back at it, I am actually very happy that it's over. He wasn't a good guy for me. He used to be, when he was younger, when he didn't blow, smoke, drank that much. I don't know how it happened, but he changed. He changed dramatically. We used to be good friends for a few months after we broke up, but we started to fight a lot, verbal, but also physically. He has kicked me a few time so hard that I fell on the ground and couldn't walk home properly any more. I know that sounds like I am exaggerating this, but I am not.
Around July, it really went wrong somewhere. I can't say anything without him being angry at me, because I say "dumb" or "stupid" things, or that all I say consist of whining and that I am annoying and that all my friends talk about me behind my back (unfortunately, this one seemed to be true). So, as you can see, this wasn't a very nice period of 2012.

What actually was a nice week in 2012 was the time I went to London with my school for five days. It was super and I enjoyed it very much! I was with some friends of mine and I slept on the same room with one of my best friends Nikki. I really loved being there. We went to some museums and the highlight of the week was the theatre show of the Woman in Black. I made a lot (good looking) pictures from my trip to London. I'm looking forward to going there again in May this year with my father. He promised me that if I would graduate with high notes, he would take me to London for a weekend!
If you're interested in my posts about London, check out my posts about Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday and Thursday!

This year, I also went to Italy with my dad and the family and I went to Crete again with my mum and the family. I really enjoyed Italy, even though I only went there for one week. The beach was great (apart from the huge amount of wind blowing there) and I even went into the sea (!) one time, practically because my dad pull me in.
The holiday in Crete was was great as well, as usual. There's not much to say about it, despite the fact that the restaurant where we always went (and still go) to eat wasn't the same any more. The crisis seems to hit them hard and I think it's a pity that Jiannis, the owner wasn't around as much as he used to. Hopefully, the restaurant will still be there this year, because there's a good chance that it will declared bankrupt. Let's just hope it won't.

I also started my new and FINAL year on high school and I cannot wait for it any longer to end. If I continue working and studying like this, I could pass my finals with good notes (London, here I come again :D) and I will finally be able to leave this horrible school and finally start doing things that I like and going where my heart tells me.

These are the highlights from 2012. I think I can do better in 2013 and therefore I made list of resolutions of 2013. I wanted to make fifty of them, but I only got to twenty-three yet. These are them:

1. Getting good grades at school and graduate with great notes
2. Going to London with my dad, making lots of pictures there
3. Start my new education
4. Do more blogging (once a week at least)
5. Dye my hair turquoise with blue dip dye
6. Let my hair grow
7. More nightlife (at least once every two months)
8. No smoking or binge drinking
9. Eat space cake with friends
10. Buy a new computer
11. Start a YouTube account with Raya and start making vlogs and gaming videos
12. No further contact with Mike, only if necessary
13. Eat healthy, exercise, etc (like yoga at home and stretching excercises)
14. Playing more vidya
15. Less publicly whining
16. Do more English (blogging, reading, talking, videos, tweeting)
17. Don’t do anything that I will regret later
18. Don’t regret anything that once made me smile
19. Start saving up money for my driving license lessons
20. Don’t do things that people want from me that I do not agree with
21. Think more positively
22. Laugh more
23. Finish my Greek course

I started working on this list already, as of now, I'm blogging, yeah! I studied today, I didn't get a new haircut today, I went out last night (!) and I made a YouTube account in preparation for the gaming project. 

Tonight I'm going out with family to see a film. It is a really good film, I heard. It's a Dutch film, so that ensures an evening full of laughter (that's also on my list!). I got no more plans for this week, except for studying a lot!

A lot of tousled talking

Today, I spent my time to do some studying. Within two weeks my exam week will start again. It will be the second exam week this year and there will be only one left before my real finals begin. It's going good so far. Everything is going according to my plans and if I will be able to continue this way, my exams shouldn't be so hard *knock knock* (I don't want to jinx it).

I'm feeling a lot better than I did a few weeks ago. School is still as terrible as it was before, but I can carry on by thinking about what will happen after I leave middle school. I will be going to the HHS (The Hague University) where I will study Social work in education and I'm so freaking excited for it! All this middle school shit, I'm just so done with it. All the people, all the teachers, the lessons and all the stupid happenings my school 'tries' to organise... Nope... I don't see myself being there for another year. Of course, I have got friends on this school. My best friends even. But there have happened things there, and I've met people there I do not want to be reminded of any longer. My dad always tells me that middle school should be the best time of my life. Maybe for him it was, I believe that he has had a nice time during middle school, but I haven't, and neither has my mum.

With thinking about going to The Hague University and can carry on for this last few months on my school. After that, I will finally be doing what I want to do. I won't be going to school with this horrible stomach ache anymore. The only thing I thing is a pity is that there are probably a lot friend I won't be seeing anymore. I know some friends who I will, probably, stay in contact with, but there are a lot who I don't see contacting me. We will all be going our own ways, live our own lives.

Oh, one thing I want to tell is that I asked the book The perks of being a Wallflower for Christmas this year, and my dad, uh, I mean, Santa, gave it to me. I'm so happy with it, because the book turns out the be even better than I imagined it to be! I can't stop reading as soon as I start, except when I fall asleep.

The other thing I did today, besides all the learning, was making a little video for on Youtube. I wanted to make my own Hair Time line, so I gathered some pictures from the past two years and put them all together in one video. I want to show you the video here!

This also made me think about something. I actually want to start making vlogs on Youtube or something, in English of course, because I want to train my speaking abilities and I want to improve my English accent. It sounds good in a way when I hear myself talking, but when I try to record it, I kind of have a total blackout and I sound so weird. I do not want to upload those videos on Youtube and make them public. I just want to keep them to myself. 

I do not know what I want to talk about yet and when I want to start doing this, but the idea is there. The only thing that I have to find is the courage and time.

Blue/purple hair!

Today, I feel like writing again, and this time, I'm going to write about my hair! Why? Because I dyed it again! I've probably told before that I dyed my hair blue with purple bangs, but it washed out and now I wanted to dye it again. I decided to bleach it first, so that my hair would all have the same colour and I had to get rid of the brown hair. The bleaching went very good! I'll post some pictures from the process!

My hair before we started the bleaching

And this is how it looked after the bleaching. It was very blonde and some spots were even white, without using a white toner! The part of my hair that was blue, turned out to be a greenish mermaid colour! I actually loved this shade :)

Now some pictures from when the dye was in!

In this picture, I'm bleaching my hair. And I almost forgot how terribly that itches!

And on these pictures you can see how blonde my hair turned out to be after the bleaching. Some parts of my hair even seemed to be white. I really love the first picture, where you can see my blonde hair plus the part where the blue was already in. 

And now! Last but not least, some pictures of the result! 

I'm so happy with how it turned out! For people who are interested, I used Directions hair dye: Atlantic Blue and Violet in the bangs. Unfortunately, it's not really possible to show the real colour on the pictures. The blue hair is somewhat darker and the purple hair is way more purple in real life! You can see the difference way better in real life. But still, I'm in love with these pictures. My hair looks so nice!

I'm sorry for a post full of pictures, but for now, I don't really have something interesting to say. Probably after Christmas, I shall write a new blogpost that is interesting to read :)

And for now, I wish all my followers a merry Christmas and a happy new year!

I'm done

I'm so fucking done. I swear. I'm so fucking done with how my life is right now. Call me a whiny bitch, fine! I don't fucking care. Think whatever you want. But believe me, as soon as I get the oppertunity, I'll be gone!

And I'll be gone forever.